Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Is It Worth It?

When God blessed me with such an amazing husband, I am convinced that he put in some rough stipulations for me (in a take it or leave it kind of fashion).
These are the things that he put into my life in exchange for such a wonderful, loving, hardworking, humble, and selfless man.

1. In exchange for this awesome husband, I have to share him with the Marine Corps. Most of the time, it will not be 50/50. In fact, most of the time, it will be 75/25 (Uncle Sam getting the better end of the bargain on that one).

2. He's going to deploy to far off and unsafe lands, and be gone for days, weeks, or months at a time for training/schools for a thankless job that no one understands (except for those who have been in his shoes).

3. When he's gone, he's going to miss out on important milestones, birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays with me.

4. There are times when he will pick the Marine Corps over his family out of sheer necessity. 

I sometimes want to yell at God and tell him the deal is off.
This life is not worth the man he gave me...
And for those of you judging me for thinking that way, you're obviously not a military spouse, because I can speak on behalf of most of them when I say that this thought has crossed my mind.
It's usually at times when I am feeling most lonely, when I just need an extra set of hands at home, when I want a day to myself without a needy toddler, when I just want to lay in bed at night with my husband, or when I see "normal" families all around me.

**To me, a "normal" family life is ANY family life where there are no such thing as deployments, extended periods of separation, and constant moving every 2-3 years**

My husband leaves today for three months for Quantico, VA for work.
I was starting to have those feelings of, "This life is not worth it." and emotionally wanted to shut down.
But yesterday, God really showed me, "It is worth it."
My husband knew exactly how I was feeling, even though I hadn't muttered a word.
He knew I was stressing out about our house, the trash, the garage, the dog, the lawn...everything.
He knew I was freaking out inside about being pregnant and alone with a toddler for the entire summer.
He knew how much I was already missing him even though he hadn't left yet.

So yesterday, my husband spent the entire day making sure I would be reassured.

Here's how God showed me that this life WAS worth it...
1. Hubby drove me all the way to Hanscom Air force base to make sure I got my new dependent military ID card because he knew mine was expiring at the end of this month. He knows I hate driving outside of our little suburb :-)

2. He took us all to the Franklin Park Zoo because he knew I had been wanting to take D there. He also knew how important it was that we did something fun together as a family before he left. 

3. I can always tell that hubby feels guilty about leaving us every time because he wants to buy us all kinds of things. He wanted to get D a special "going away" present. He got her a Razor scooter, and got to enjoy a few hours in the late afternoon yesterday teaching her to ride it.

4. He knew I was stressing about only having a month when he got back to get everything ready for the baby and the nursery. He spent a lot of time on leave painting the nursery, putting the crib and some shelving together, and getting it somewhat "baby ready".
 Can ya tell what the nursery colors are?! I'll have another post on the nursery soon!

5. We have a large yard with a lot of landscaping and upkeep that needs to be done on it. He didn't want my prego butt to be out there doing it, so he got with our neighbors and made sure that our grass would be cut, and he made sure he cut it one final time himself. He also spent the entire weekend laying down 24 giant bags of mulch down.

6. The dog. I decided to fly home for a month and half from June-July to be with my folks, and I was stressing out about what we would do with Dozer. Low and behold...he took care of that too! (He also gave the dog one last bath)
7. Our garage was a disaster, and I had mentioned a month ago that I needed to pull the Jeep out and sweep it. Of course, I never got around to it. Not only did he sweet the garage for me, he rearranged everything to make it neater, and made space in it so that we could park both vehicles in it.

8. On top of ALL OF THAT, he did the million loads of laundry that I had been putting off for me last night, did the dishes that had been piling up in our sink, and he cooked our family one last pancake, eggs, and bacon breakfast this morning.

Did I mention, he hasn't even begun packing for himself?!?!?!

God really showed me that this life WAS worth it.
I realized just how lucky I was.
I know there are many struggling marriages out in the world, and they don't even have to deal with military life on top of typical marriage probs. 
We have normal daily struggles as a couple, just like any other marriage, but I realized what makes our marriage so extraordinary is the unique circumstances that God put on us.

With this life, I've become more independent, I've learned how to do basic plumbing, I have learned the art of multitasking, I've learned how to play "mommy AND daddy", I've had no choice but to rely solely on God, and I've become a "prayer warrior".

This life is worth it...

I wouldn't have it any other way.

Some fun stuff we did last week (since blogger was being a poop).

Lunch with daddy on campus at Boston U.

Hanging out with daddy in his office. Excuse the redsox sticker...it was there before he took over the office...puke.

D got her first ever ice cream truck experience.

 Just some funny pics of Dozer sleeping in the car.


  1. That's totally sweet! Strangely enough, military life has become "normal" to me. I hope the three months fly by for you!

    1. Thank you! I don't think I'll ever feel like this life is normal. Lol


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