Sunday, July 20, 2014

How Much of Me is Real?

A friend of mine posted this link on Facebook.
It starts with..

 "Everyone on Facebook looks like they're having a great time. Fun adventures, deep romances, amazing jobs. It's enough to make you feel inadequate, but it's also a lie. Nobody is really as happy as their Facebook wall claims"
If you don't want to look at it, it's a short video about a guy posting status updates on Facebook embellishing his life to make it seem like something better than what it is.

I started thinking about my own personal activity on social media, and started questioning how much of what I post (which I post daily) is truly what my life is.
I went back and scrolled through my Facebook status updates, and the majority of them are posts about my kids, my husband, and fitness (mostly running).
Rightfully so...
Three passions of mine are my kids, my husband, and running, so it makes sense that most of my statuses on Facebook would be about those 3. 
I would say 90% of my Facebook posts are generally positive posts (the 10% being complaining mostly).
When I look back at my Facebook statuses and photos, my life looks pretty put together.
I'm constantly posting about how proud I am of my husband, how much I love him, how much I miss him, and I brag about him all the time.
I post a gazillion photos of my kids because frankly, I think my kids are freaking adorable.
I like to run, so when I do get a good run in, I like to post my times, a post run sweaty selfie.
But anyone with half a brain knows that no one's life is "perfect", and I have never claimed to have the "perfect life".

When I choose to share something with the world on social media, it's because it's something that makes me happy and I want to share, or something I'm proud of.
 Do I embellish things? Sure. Everyone does does to an extent...even without realizing it.

"OMG! Best husband ever! He got off work early!"
but really...
"Nick got home from work early because I about had a nervous break down with the kids, and this horrible week I've had. We actually argued on the phone because I asked him to take off, and he was mad that I would ask him to do such a thing."

Looking in hindsight, I didn't want to air my dirty laundry out like that, and I chose to post something that made me sound more grateful than the raging "b" word that I actually was.
But at the end of day, I truly was grateful that despite how we got there, he did chose to come home early to give me a break.
I wanted everyone to know that I do, in fact, have a great one needs to know that he originally didn't want to leave work early for me.

 But does this make me unauthentic and not genuine because I choose to post about the good things about my life?
My life, my marriage, my parenting, my kids, my running...all of it has major flaws.
But there are just some things that I don't think anyone else needs to know about except for my family and me. 
When my marriage is struggling (which it has before), I'm not gonna put it all out there on Facebook for everyone to know because it's a private matter.
You'll notice that I do a lot less bragging about my husband when we are fighting behind the computer though (if you ever want to try and decipher my marriage via social media). 
I've blogged plenty about my marriage, and the ringer it's been put through "no thanks" to military life.
But I don't want to put that all over Facebook.

I know that no one's life is perfect, and I'm sure there are people who post less than true status updates and photos to make themselves feel better, more superior, make others feel jealous, or whatever...
I like to think that most of the people I choose to keep as friends on Facebook are truly genuine people.
I don't accept EVERYONE's friend requests, and I have been known to accept and delete someone faster than FloJo.
 My name on Facebook is even altered so people can't find me (as easily).

The truth is, only a fraction of my life is social media. 
If you know me outside of the internet, you would know that there is so much more to me than pretty pictures of my kids, run times, and husband bragging.

So, if you think someone's life looks "perfect" based on their Facebook page, just know that you're relying on just a small portion of their actual life.

And because I have ridiculously cute kids....
Here's some photos for your viewing pleasure!

Took the kids out to eat at Outback last night, and there was a table full of girls behind us.
This kid spent the entire night turned around staring at them....creeper.

Sunday morning selfie before heading to church!

My favorite part of every weekend....
Getting to Facetime with this handsome guy!
We only have TWO more sundays alone, and he'll be home!!!! yay!!!


  1. Oh yeah, I know no one has a perfect life. There are some people on my list who try to act like it though. I post the good, the bad, and ugly on my page. I have crying photos of my kids and messes they've made. And ramen noodles we have to eat, if we're trying to save.

  2. We have a saying at MOPS -- "Don't judge your everyday life by someone else's highlight reel" -- and honestly, I think that's exactly what Facebook has become. Which isn't so much a bad thing, as long as people remember that it's just that. Because honestly?! I'd rather read a million positive happy bragging posts about husbands and kids than read even a handful of statuses with people airing their dirty laundry!

    1. I love that saying!!!! Definitely writing that one down!

  3. I find myself reading blogs sometimes and thinking "how perfect their lives are". It doesn't take me long to remember though that I'm only reading what they want me to know!!!

  4. I agree with you. What I put on my blog and personal FB are just highlights. I leave most of the negative for my personal life. Sure there is venting but really if you want to talk about your problems call your BFF or sister or mom. Your old co-worker or friend's husband probably really doesn't want to read it. JMO

  5. Love this! There are certain problems that I don't want ALL of my FB friends, blog readers, Instagram followers, etc to know about. I post some of the not so pretty things about my life, but the vast majority of what I post is positive. Because I'm a positive person (normally!).


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