Friday, January 9, 2015

Let's Talk About Turning 30

I was down the dumps this week for no reason at all.
I'm a woman, and I'm allowed to have hormonal moments.
My kids irritated me...
Nick irritated...
People at the gym irritated me....
It was just one of those weeks.
Yesterday, Nick came home with some flowers and a Cosmo (the magazine, not the drink...although the drink might have been nice too).
It definitely lifted my spirits, and gosh...I can't remember the last time I read a Cosmo.
Cosmo was my "single girl bible" back in my early twenties.
I've learned as I've gotten older (and more wiser) that most of what's in Cosmo is straight trash which is why I haven't picked one up in so long.
Still, I was excited that Nick picked one up for me, and I finally got to sit down this afternoon and skim through it.
Beyond the silly quizzes, "hot sex moves", and "slim down quick" articles, I came across one that I genuinely agreed with.
It's called, "Let's Talk About Turning 30".

It talked about 2 things you should know by the time you're 30, and 2 things you should have done by the time you're 30.
I agreed with all of them!
You can pick up a copy yourself if you want to know, but without details, they are:

 By 30, You Should Know:
1) How to fall in love without losing yourself
2) Whether or not you want to have children
By 30, You Should Have:
1) Stopped being boy crazy
2) A black lace bra, custom fitted

I started thinking about my life's lessons leading up to 30.
I decided to come up with my 2 things You Should Know, and 2 things You Should Have based on my life..
I turned 30 last March, and I've told so many people that I am happier at 30 than I ever was in my 20's, and getting older doesn't bother me like it used to in my 20's.
So here it is...
(And this is just MY opinion...feel free to disagree!!!)

2 Things You Should Know (by the time you're 30:
1) The number on the scale doesn't mean jack
I spent the majority of my 20's obsessing over my weight. I've dealt with disordered eating, yo-yo dieting, diet pills, extreme name it...I've tried it. I let the number on the scale dictate my happiness and my worth. It wasn't until my late 20's that I realized that all those years I spent obsessing over a number on the scale, I could have been spending building a healthy lifestyle. At 30, I'm the fittest I've ever been, I eat what I want (in moderation), I drink wine, and most importantly...I'm not the skinniest I've ever been! I am the strongest I've ever been, and this trusty body has given birth to TWO babies! 

2) 30 doesn't mean your need to speed up life to accomplish things you said you would by 30
I know so many people who have a "30 by 30" list, or goals they wish to have accomplished by 30. They make it seem like 30 is this HUGE number, and if you haven't accomplished those things by 30, your life is total failure. I find it amusing because I feel like 30 is when I really started living my life. This is coming from the girl who spent 10 years (the majority of her 20's) as a Marine! But up until 30, I was still learning about myself, and learning to be comfortable in my own skin. Honestly, looking back at my 20's, I see a lost young girl who thought she knew everything. At 30, I'm going back to school, I'm a full time mom to 2 gorgeous children, a full time wife to a husband who loves me and respects me....
Notice, I didn't say "AMAZING HUSBAND"!
Actually, by 30, if you're married or in a relationship, let's stop talking about our "amazing husbands"....surely at 30, we can come up with some better adjectives than "amazing".

By 30, You Should Have: 
1) Retirement Plan (finances)
I'm so blessed to have gotten to work under such amazing leadership as a younger Marine, and was taught good financial management. After my first deployment to Iraq, 20 year old me walked into Edward Jones, and invested all my deployment money into a Roth IRA, and each deployment I went one, I invested all of it. If you know Marines, you know that most of us tend to come back from deployment and blow all of our hard earned combat pay on a cars and material possessions. But once someone showed me how much more money I'd have by the time I was 50 investing at 20 vs 30, I knew what I had to do. It's never too late to start investing for your future, but I honestly believe that by 30, you're pushing it.

2) An investment piece in your closet that is not Forever 21
I am all about a bargain, and cheap clothes! TRUST ME! But one thing my mom has taught me is about quality and timeless pieces. My mom has Louis Vuittons that are over 10-15 years old, and they have never gone out of a style. I'm not saying you need to go splurge on a $1000-$2000 dollar purse, but maybe saving up some money and buying a nice black dress from Nordstrom's... I have a pair of black patent leather Kate Spade peep toe heels that I bought while Nick was deployed to wear to his homecoming, and those heels remain in the nice satin bag they come with to protect it. I only wear them for special occasions. I have a couple timeless designer bags that I keep protected in bags knowing that one day, I'll be able to give them to my daughter. I just feel by the time you're 30, you should have at least ONE grown up SOMETHING in your closet.

I guess the thing I want people to get out of this is that 30 isn't the "end all". 
I have so many more dreams at 30 than I did when I was 18, 21, 25....
I look at life with a more careful approach rather than a "I'm gonna conquer the world" attitude like I did in my 20's.
Don't get me wrong, I had a LOT of fun in my 20's.
I've done things in the Marine Corps and been to places that most people will never do or see in their lifetimes. 
I'm fortunate for those opportunities, but honestly...
I have a feeling my next 10 years are gonna be way more awesome than my last 10.


  1. GREAT post. I turn 25 next month... my husband and I are getting our finances in order with a fabulous 10 year plan.. it is NEVER too early to start. I'm not even thinking about 30 yet, but why stop there. Like you said. Life isn't over at 30... maybe it is just beginning.

  2. Being 30 is nice. It feels a lot calmer than 20 or 25.

  3. I am looking forward to 30. I've always said -- the 20s are for making mistakes and learning, the 30s are for enjoying life.

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